Monthly Archives September 2003


I wish I were a falcon, coasting on the breeze. I wish I were an ant, methodical and obstinate. I wish I were a shell, to be washed away to sea. I wish I were tree, sturdy and shady. I wish I were a table, battered but never bruised. I wish I were a flower, […]

kind of peace

12:40 AM. I have found some peace at the end of today. The thoughts and feelings are still there inside me but subdued, willing to be reshaped and revisited another, less emotional day. Perhaps it was listening to Riverdance, or seeing Camp again, or getting that fingers-crossed-for e-mail from Paul that did it. Whatever it […]

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I am a horrible person. I lack the characteristics that I would most pride myself in if I had them. I am impatient, and I am not as forgiving as I should be. Moreover, I am too uptight and I should be more easygoing. I blame other people even when it isn’t really their actions […]

Two things

First this poem, that I found, and I don’t know who wrote it: Where are my angles? Are they gone? Ginsberg had Mohammedan The Romantics had Nature What are ours? Do they rise from the smoke of industry Fly on the clouds of impurity White wings dirtied with sin Blackening till they fall Beautiful in […]

A pointless day

I am already flagging in accomplishing anything this week. The only semi-productive things I did today were installing Microsoft Office on my laptop and entering two months worth of receipt in my mother’s checkbook register. That’s *all*. For the WHOLE day. Okay, so I typed up a page of stuff for my mother. Hardly any […]

The worst part…

…about crying is how it doesn’t show up when you’re typing on the computer. Or maybe that’s the best part. Depends on whether you want other people to know. I can’t fathom why I would want someone to know but crying all alone is lonely and even more upsetting. I wish…I don’t even know what […]


I’m happy. I just discovered that Camp is now showing at regular times again and not just at 9 PM. I want to see it again. But with whom? Man, I’ll see it by myself if I have to. Maybe Lisa could go sometime. I think it is something that the girls I know are […]


I’m confused. I was blue, then I perked up, and now I’m just befuddled. Dunno why. My goal is to end this week feeling like I accomplished something. I can’t think what else to say because that would involve thinking, and I’m too muddled to think. Oh well.