As some of you may know, I have a younger sister named Esther who is a senior in high school this year. I love her dearly, though we don’t always see eye to eye, and lately I have been extremely worried about her. She has been depressed for the past year or two, and tends to shut herself off from communicating with the rest of the family. Despite this, I’ve enjoyed the time I spend with her when I’m home. We’ve had some scary incidents involving her hurting herself, but she always seemed to he holding together overall. I guess that simply wasn’t the case.
I found out today that she has been skipping classes at school and is nearly failing some of them. The implications of this are multifold. First, the treatments she is undergoing such as therapy and medication are obviously not doing the full/right thing for her. Second, she’s unable to or perhaps simply doesn’t make good decisions. Third, she’s been lying or at least obfuscating the truth from my parents. And four, if her grades don’t get better, she risks losing her college acceptance.
All this being said, I find myself feeling utterly helpless. I simply don’t know what I, or anyone for that matter, can do for her. I call her to check in and say hello… I let her know I care about her and appreciate her… but she doesn’t want to talk to anyone, and she doesn’t want to let anyone touch her. I can’t be at home for her, but even if I were she doesn’t let anyone “be there” for her. I feel bad because I know she must compare herself to me on some level, even if that is not at the root of the problem. I want to understand what she’s going through, to let her know it’s okay and that everyone has rough times. But how can I do that if she won’t talk to me? I feel worried and terribly distressed.
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